FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
i just made my gag reflex go away.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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