Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Mom said you looked used
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
i black out too much to be "responsible"
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize