Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
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