If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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