If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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