I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
