just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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