Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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