He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
