i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize