Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
