I feel great
I just peed on a car
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
