I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
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