Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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