and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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