so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
