bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
