i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
