my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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