He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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