Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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