I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
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