how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
