you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
