I think im going to throw up on grandma
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
