So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
