i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
