Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
