My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
only you would photoshop your dick
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
