Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
the room spins SO much faster in panama
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
