Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
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