nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
