Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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