I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
