GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
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