I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
