Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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