Bisexual people are plain selfish.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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