I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize