This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Randomize
