that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Randomize
