I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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