Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(206): View more from Washington

Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.

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(805): View more from California

you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.

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(702): View more from Nevada

She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.

Fav 10 3620 1179
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(862): View more from New Jersey

I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?

Fav 3 1150 4249
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(519): View more from Ontario

Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.

Fav 8 2463 1338
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(504): View more from Louisiana

Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.

Fav 7 3165 964
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(816): View more from Missouri

He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.

Fav 5 2788 1562
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(216): View more from Ohio

Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..

Fav 9 1600 783
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(224): View more from Illinois

Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating

Fav 0 10 28
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