My friends, they love my intelligence
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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