What a fucking waste of an outfit
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I need water and some morals
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
