Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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