ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
