You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Randomize
