I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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