Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
