That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
