My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
