if only i could text you this smell
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
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